...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
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