With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
