Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
