I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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