dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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