is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize