I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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