Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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