Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
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