that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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