best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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