I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
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Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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