12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
