i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
