I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize