Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize