I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
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Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
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I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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