i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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