I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.