it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
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