Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
now i know why i became what i already was.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Is Oprah even human
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
