If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize