I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
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