so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
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both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
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I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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