Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
