Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
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