I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
