waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Randomize
