george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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