Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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