i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Text me some of your sweat
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
