Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
