maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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