Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Randomize
