I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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