is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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