Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
