At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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