im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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