Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
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