shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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