Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
