Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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