No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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