Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize