I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Randomize