if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Randomize