You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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