he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
