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• (815): View more from Illinois

  my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"

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• (408): View more from California

  Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple

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• (626): View more from California

  Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies

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• (805): View more from California

  It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife

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• (584): View more from

  You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.

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• (917): View more from New York City

  My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...

  (1-917): View more from New York City

  Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...

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