Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
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